Worldly possibilities

How many people wonder what life has in store for them? Are there certain destinies to behold or how do I put it, explanations in life that cannot be told? For I am one of those people that judged and belittled what was not my belief. Somehow that made sense to me and spiritual reclusiveness was part of the package for me.

My life consisted of having a wonderful upbringing, living in the suburbs of Melbourne with my family and enjoying the simple things in life. I was not a religious person nor was my family. Pretty much Atheism was what we all believed in. I did attend an Anglican school for my education but was not aware of how religion would play a part in the school curriculum. During Religious Education, I remember being perplexed and bored. I would not listen and hardly remember anything that my teacher taught me.

    

If I had been brought up in a different family with religious beliefs, then maybe there would be a different outcome. Who knows! All I know is that my culture, faith, lifestyle and outside influences made me who I am today. I believe in life lessons and the journey of my life changed at the age of 38 when I had a spiritual awakening.

ABOUT MY FAMILY: We lived in the same home in Melbourne all of my childhood. We were very settled and had the good old family values. 
     

My mum: She spent many years working in retail, cleaning homes and being around for my brother and myself. She must have wanted to pull her hair out so many times as I look back now and wonder why we did not appreciate what she did for us.

My dad: He worked for Australia Post and I was so excited one day when he came home in the big red Australia Post truck. I sat in it while dad drove me around the block. That was the one thing I remember from my childhood, but the funny thing is that he did not deliver mail, that was not his job!

My brother: We did fight like cat and dog, but I thought that is what brothers and sisters did. I was the oldest child and have many fond memories of spending time in our cubby house, climbing trees, getting up to mischief together and trying to inhale a cigarette with him in my bedroom.

My husband: We met when I moved over to Boston. I decided at the age of 24 I would become an Au pair and I met him at a house party in Cambridge MA. Those were the years of living it up, not having any responsibilities and having a care free existence with plenty of booze and partying taken into consideration. He has always been an Atheist and so was I when we met, this is the one thing that has discombobulated him about our marriage now that I have become a Spiritualist.

 My son: Well he is nearly a teenager now and an only child. He always wanted a sibling, but we could not conceive another child. He was born with the assistance of IVF and I found out I had cancer when I was four months pregnant with him. This was the beginning of my spiritual awakening.

                                                                                                                                        

THE BEGINNING OF THE AWAKENING

I was really excited being pregnant. It took a long time to conceive and we ended up going through IVF. I was four months pregnant and going through my day to day journey of pregnancy hormones, mood swings and the stages of abrupt psychopathic tendencies that many pregnant women face.

I went over to my parents’ home one morning where I was sitting on the couch having a chat to my mum. I remember looking down at my leg which had a small mole on it, nothing had changed with it and there were no warning signs. Suddenly I felt a tingling going through my body, felt a sensation just like butterflies appearing and I kept hearing the word ‘cancer’. I freaked out and again I heard the same word. I said to my mum “I have cancer”. She told me to stop being so ridiculous and again I explained there was something wrong. My mum reassured me and told me to go to the doctor if I thought that.

I picked up the phone, called my doctor and they were not available. I then called a random clinic nearby and they saw me straight away. They told me they would take a bit of the mole out and call me on the phone a few days later with the news. I was correct, I had a melanoma.

How did I know? What was going on? The worst part was that when I visited my usual doctor a few days later, she told me that she was glad she was not around. She would have waited until after I gave birth. Would I have remembered to go back to the doctor and would I still be around today? They are the questions I still wonder about.

Who would think that something so small like that would change my life. There are times that make no sense at all but then you realise they are the most important parts of your life that shape you to who you are today.



Jacqui Ray
www.growthhealing.com.au